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Hilarious Beauty Practises & Myths About Us Women… Oops.

Jan 15, 2020

Thankfully, we’ve been debunking myths for years.

But sometimes (most of the time), they’re pretty funny.

And of course, along the way, there have been some fantastically ridiculous myths about women.

Not only that, there have been some bizarre beauty practises us women have unfortunately taken part in throughout the years.

So, here are a few things that may give you a little giggle today…

Three nipples? You’re probably a Witch.

Now, we say three nipples, but in all honesty, it was pretty much any kind of mark on your body that could be classed as the ‘Witch’s Mark’.

So, anything from a bruise, to a birthmark, to a mole.

If found, you faced going to trial to await a very unfortunate fate…

Periods… in general

There has been many a myth about periods throughout the years, and honestly, they’re all great.

Supposedly, they can destroy crops, turn wine sour, and cause us to be incapable of doing absolutely anything.

We also cannot work whilst on our period because we are supposedly more prone to going insane…

So, please may we have the day off work?

Aching eyes and a sore neck? Your womb is overflowing.

Well, it’s not, but the Egyptians believed it was.

Thankfully, your overflowing womb was an easy fix. All you needed to do was fumigate your womb with incense and oil, fumigate your eyes with goose fat, and eat an entire donkey liver.

We’ve definitely got that stuff lying around HQ somewhere…

Fancy glowing skin? Here’s some radioactive face cream…

Before anyone knew of the health risks, radioactive products were all the rage (seriously, there was a whole range of them).

Supposedly, the face cream could rid you of wrinkles, spots, and even out redness.

Well, it would until your face melted off…

Lead makeup, anyone?

Thankfully, life isn’t as rough on the skin as what it used to be.

But back in the 1700s, things were pretty tough (and incredibly dirty), so it took a lot to cover your skin to give you that beautiful pale complexion that was so popular.

Lead makeup offered total coverage… whilst also being toxic.

People were aware of this fact, but still went ahead and used it anyway. Eventually, it would kill you, but hey… fashion… right girls?

Anyway, about that day off…

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